I’ve had many sewing machines over the years. A cheap, beginner Brother that I used when I lived in Paris. I didn’t have a table so it would sit with me on the floor, crouched over, a foot out to control the pedals. I didn’t know what a hem was really, I draped and sewed with reckless abandon and wore almost none of it.

Then an old Elna which weighed so much I had to carry it to my sixth floor apartment in stages. And when it started smoking half way through quilting the three layers of my first ever full-size quilt, I upgraded to a fancy Bernina B 350. My first new machine.

The machine was brilliant—it’s still brilliant and I highly recommend it— but it’s not the one I’m reviewing today. Because when my partner came into some cash and asked me what kind of thing I’d want if I was going to really splash out, my inner child answered: a sewing machine that can do embroidery. I’d heard that a nearby school had one when I was a child and had never quite got the dream of it out of my head. There’s just something about embroidery that I find pure magic. I did a lot of research, spoke to a bunch of machine technicians about which ones had the most issues and settled on the Janome Memory Craft 15000.

And listen, I don’t believe that a good machine makes for a good sewist, but my gosh, does this machine help. It’s solid—like insanely heavy, solid— unfailingly neat, surprisingly quiet and it sews a invisible zip invisibly and gets through so many layers that the only thing you’ll be worried about are your fingers. It’s got that complicated look and a screen that lets you pick from one of their many many stitches, plus all the fancy gadgets that made me almost a little shy to admit that this was my machine and not some sturdy, classic one that feels a little more me. But when you flip the embroidery arm out and it gets going, the childish excitement is real.

Last year I made fifty items of clothing on that machine. When you spend that long using a tool it either becomes your companion or your nemesis. Let’s just say that my bestie is turning three this year and still the best buying decision I ever made. Imagine, I could have asked for a handbag or a holiday? Instead I got a literal childhood dream come true.